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Since pediatric-type humor seems to be appreciated, here's something I think everyone will enjoy (sorry it ends at "D", that's all I received).
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MOM'S DICTIONARY
AIRPLANE: What Mom impersonates to get a 1-yr.-old to eat strained beets.
ALIEN: What Mom would suspect had invaded her house if she spotted a
child-size creature cleaning up after itself.
APPLE: Nutritious lunchtime dessert which children will trade for cupcakes.
BABY: 1. Dad,when he gets a cold. 2. Mom's youngest child, even if he's 42.
BATHROOM: a room used by the entire family, believed by all except Mom to be
self-cleaning.
BECAUSE: Mom's reason for having kids do things which can't be explained logically.
BED AND BREAKFAST: Two things the kids will never make for themselves.
CARPET: Expensive floor covering used to catch spills and clean mud off shoes.
CAR POOL: Complicated system of transportation where Mom always winds up
going the furthest with the biggest bunch of kids who have had the most sugar.
CHINA: Legendary nation reportedly populated by children who love leftover vegetables.
COOK: 1. Act of preparing food for consumption. 2. Mom's other name.
COUCH POTATO: What Mom finds under the sofa cushions after the kids eat dinner.
DATE: Infrequent outings with Dad where Mom can enjoy worrying about the kids
in a different setting.